Fantasy and Reality
When two people are involved in a long-term, stable and comfortable relationship, any fantasy can be anchored in the couple’s life. Beyond the state of excitement and pleasure, we must recognize that fantasies open windows to their own desires. Which we either share or keep for personal satisfaction.
I hope you agree with me when I say that a relationship with moments of sincerity in intimacy is healthy for both partners. When each reveals more and more about himself, he or she gives the other the opportunity to know him or her better. And maybe to understand it.
Although I know many of my husband’s fantasies, I admit that I do not always understand him.
When we bring our fantasies into the real world, they simply become experiences. And other new fantasies are taking their place in our minds and on our lips. But when we turn sexual dreams into reality, we must not forget that each person has their own psychological barriers that, most of the time, do not overlap with those of the life partner.
For a long time my limit was the pattern of marriage. His limit was always beyond.
After the fantasy of posting intimate pictures on different platforms became a reality, my husband told me about a new desire – to really share me with someone else. That was the moment when I felt that I had reached the end, because I had reached my psychological limits. My need to belong was no longer satisfied. Because the new fantasy he brought to the couple put me in the position of no longer just being his.
So, at that point, my husband’s approach was cautious – he abandoned the subject for a while, moving the fantasy back into his mind.
This fantasy no longer exists, because in the meantime it has become a reality. But in retrospect, I realize that the two of us have managed to shape our own barriers and patiently push them higher and higher.
(This post is from a series of confessions about how I became a hotwife. If you want to read the first part, you can find it here.)